What Picking Pumpkins From a Pumpkin Patch taught me About Love

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment
What Picking Pumpkins From a Pumpkin Patch taught me About Love
( I may or not be trying to consume the baby gourd that looks like a pumpkin)
Over the past few months, I’ve been struggling quite a bit with understanding myself and learning to value that I see myself as more than the girl I used to be.  That just because my old friends knew me as the OCD/Plannerized-insane being, that doesn’t mean that my new friends have to see me that way, nor do I have to choose to see myself in that old and stealthy dimmed light.
Transforming into the funny girl with lots of smiles and laughs though hasn’t been all rainbows and sunshine.  And although yes, this is my authentic character that had gotten hidden underneath the layers of self-hate, comparison, stress, and a slew of negative experiences, that doesn’t mean that the process has been 100% easy to live with.  Loving myself, and learning how to love others correctly, for instance, is something I still struggle with on a daily basis.
Because as much as I would like to tell you that I wake up every morning and take the advice that I so lovingly give to others about their worth and self-esteem, I honestly don’t.  That as much as I write about Jesus, and how His love is so unlike anything we will ever experience in this temporary life, I still find myself longing to understand the magnitude of this conception.  And that although I profess to others that this life is beautiful, and love is not a feeling or emotion, but a state of living in God’s Will, I too still struggle to make it through periods of loneliness, drought, and feeling anything but loved.
However, while going to the Pumpkin Patch yesterday with my Mom, God began to reveal to me the aspects of this love in an entirely new light.  As I walked across the crisply fallen leaves of fall and weaved my way in and out of the vines that entangled my every step, the number of pumpkins that surrounded my feet surprised me.  Sure, there were probably 3,000 pumpkins in that field to be picked, but at least half of that number had already been selected and were sitting beside of the vine they once grew from.  Looking down at those pumpkins that had already been picked, I found myself resilient to pick any like that, and instead choose the ones that were still freshly attached to their source of life.  My Mother on the other hand, though looked at the pumpkins that were already picked, but still sitting on the ground and said, “Nothing is wrong with them, so why don’t we pick a few of those?”
Allowing her words to sink in, I was appalled at the voices in my head that said, “Why would I do that,” when I had no justification.  Other than not being as fun as searching for the “perfect” pumpkin, and getting to rip it off the vine itself, this got me thinking a whole lot about love, and a whole lot less about the pumpkins I was picking.
I think sometimes in life we approach love in the same way that we approach these pumpkins.  We search high and low for the “perfect”one and avoid all of those that have already been picked and placed over.  Though a few are unsalvageable due to rotting, many are perfectly great pumpkins, we just simply aren’t attracted to them, find them as our ideal “choice,”or want to have the fun in the chase and search of our own selection instead.  And don’t we tend to do the same thing with love?  We meet hundreds of people, probably even thousands every single year, but this one isn’t the right height, this one is too weird, this one isn’t “the one,”and so on and so forth.  But what if we stopped looking for what we thought we wanted, and just allowed God and His Will for love in our lives to rein instead?  What if we stopped comparing the “brand new” pumpkin, to the one that was already picked and neatly placed on the ground beside of us?
Perhaps Jesus is trying to teach me something about love, through something as strange as a girl aimlessly wandering through a pumpkin patch.  To reveal to me that in life, there may be three types of people and the love that they offer:
1)    The picked-over pumpkin– Though there is nothing inherently wrong with this pumpkin, you simply don’t want to pick it off the ground, take it home to your loving front porch, and show it off to your friends.  “Wow, I bet that was a big task to rip off the vine,” the voices would never ask.  You simply aren’t attracted to this pumpkin for a variety of reasons.  Maybe you want to get enthralled in the chase and search of your own, maybe you just don’t like its shape or height, or maybe, there is nothing wrong with it, but your heart just says “no.”
Some people that you meet in life will reflect this picked over pumpkin.  In fact, maybe you yourself are the picked-over the pumpkin.  You’ve fallen off of your vine, but no one ever seems to be interested.  Though there is nothing wrong with you (and most likely there isn’t), people just pass you by.  And if we’re being honest, being the “picked over pumpkin” doesn’t feel too good, or do much for your self-esteem/worth.  Too many times have I been the victim of this problem.  “Why do guys never like me?” I question, when my friends and family assure me that they do, I am just oblivious or unaware.  “Why do I always want to look taller, more athletic, more “perfect”?” my mind ponders when I already know that who I am, and who God created me to be should be enough.  “Why do I get picked over from the other girls whose lives are as real as the super star models we see in magazines?”my heart sinks.  “Why does it scare you so much to be the picked over pumpkin?”the Holy Spirit prompts me as I hear God finish with, “when that’s all that I’ve asked you to be?”
In all of their less than appealing initial encounter, these pumpkins offer the purest form of love.  They know what’s like to go without it; therefore, they strive all the more prominently to give it.  They realize that they are imperfect, yet they long to live, and love, and grow anyways.
2)    The rotting pumpkin– Unlike the picked-over pumpkin the rotting pumpkin can’t be salvaged or saved for anything.  You can’t take him home to cook with, it is too late to carve its disintegrating flesh, and the smell alone is enough to make you never want another pumpkin [milkshake, pie, cookie, roll, latte] ever again in your life.
In life, these pumpkins are the people you should stay away from, and the type of love that they try to entice you with.  These are the guys and girls that pursue without really caring about you as an individual.  They are the ones who believe that most slept with people, one-night stands, porn, and any other means of fake satisfaction are what fully define love.  The guys who act like they really like a girl just to get her to have sex with them, for instance, or the girls who dress like prostitutes to appear attractive because they love for this deceptive affection so badly are both examples.
Yet what the world doesn’t show you about these types of pumpkins, and the love that they embody is how evil, ugly, and decaying they are on the inside.  Like the picked over pumpkin, they might even try to trick you into choosing them.  Into lowering your standards, and giving them a chance, because “hey, if you can get over the smell, it isn’t that bad of a bargain.”  But is that really the type of love you want to engage in?  The kind that appears perfect on the outside, but when you get to know it deeper, the putrid flesh of its core is enough to make you get sick?
Sure this love might be satisfying for a temporary pleasure, but will it fulfill the need you feel in your heart?  Will it replace the void that exists? (And if you are wondering, the answer is no.  If you don’t have a personal relationship with Jesus, then you will always be looking to mere men to fill this need, and sadly, with this type of pumpkin, you will never be satisfied.  If you do have a relationship with Jesus though, this type of pumpkin still won’t ever satisfy.  In fact, it will most likely leave you feeling less loved that you did, to begin with).
3)    The new and “perfect” pumpkin– If I’m completely vulnerable with you, I would love to say that the “perfect”pumpkin was achievable in all facets of life.  But if I were to tell you that, I would not only be lying to myself, but to all of you.  As much as we would like to think that there is the “perfect” pumpkin and “perfect”love existing somewhere in this world, it simply isn’t true.
For example, even in the brand new pumpkins that I freshly plucked from the vine, they still had strange shapes, random chunks out of the side, color discoloration, and so on and so forth.  But you know what?  They still work!  They are still cute.  They are still usable for me to paint, carve, decorate, and show off to my friends.  They have just transformed into the picked-over pumpkin that I once wouldn’t give a second glance to.
The same thing then goes for their love.  Because there is no “perfect” pumpkin, let alone “perfect”anything in this world that we live, there certainly isn’t “perfect” love that we, as humans are able to possess.  Yes, Jesus Christ is perfect, and the love He embodies is perfect, but the love that we experience from others, and long to crave after will never be perfect. 
We are messy and fallen beings in the result of a messy and fallen world.  But like the picked-over pumpkins, we still work.  We still shine.  We still love- it just looks different than what the world might expect it to.
In resolution, I like to think that Jesus, in all of His perfection, love, and glory often chose the picked-over pumpkin and even reflected that of one Himself.  Though he never fell off the path that God had set for Him, He did represent love in a way that would seem unrecognizable, strange, and uncalled for to that of the world.
Like my mom, I am learning to choose to pick the picked over pumpkin, because when the right person comes along, they will cherish and love me (and you!) with all they have.  Just like Jesus, they will know where you’ve been, and how you’ve fallen off along the way, but what matters most is the potential and life you bring to the future.  And they will want that.  Hewill want that.   Because even in your picked over patch, He will pick you up, take you home, wash you off, and make you more glorious than you ever thought you could be.
Love the picked-over pumpkins friends.  Be the picked-over pumpkin.  Give that type of love to yourself, but then also don’t forget to lavish that now adored love upon other people. 
Picking pumpkins from a pumpkin patch taught me about love: How to give it, how to receive it, how to know it, how to embody it, and how to pick it.

(Be the picked-over pumpkin 🙂 )

The Nice Girl With Good Intentions

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment
The nice girl with good intentions
 

(Photo Credits Belong To Photographer: Rachel Barnitz). 

Ever since I was a very little girl, I have had an extreme passion for loving on and serving others, and regardless of what other people thought I always did this out of the honest sincerity in my heart to show them the love of Jesus through these actions. In the world we live today; however, people can pick and prod at these good intentions. They can scrutinize what you are doing, and eventually, eat at that beautiful heart of yours, making you feel nothing less than the love you were so desperately trying to give other people.
Likewise, being the “nice” girl isn’t always easy; trust me. It can be difficult to face day after day with a huge smile, bright eyes, and glittering compliments for others when no one is willing to return the favor. Now with that statement, don’t get me wrong. I don’t do good things by expecting something in return. In fact, if I did, that would be ignorant, selfish, and rude. However, what I am saying is that sometimes, it is okay to be discouraged by always being the nice girl with good intentions. To be the girl that everyone reaches out to simply because they know she will listen and genuinely care. To be the girl that plasters sticky notes on her friend’s cars and makes them their favorite desserts because she knows that it will make them smile. To be the girl that carries around a zillion granola bars and is known for it because isn’t feeding the hungry souls that we interact with what God has called each of us to do? And I suppose that’s why only God can understand the true intentions of our heart, while the world merely persecutes their existence, looking for anything and everything deceptive to mock of their kind doing. Why the world can’t even begin to fathom that as a 21-year-old single female, I love to do things for other people without the connotation that I will get anything in return; that my intentions are pure and my heart is right because I want to share His love with others. That I have a love radiating so deeply inside of me, I just want to share it with people in order to make them happy. But unfortunately, the world doesn’t see the nice girl with good intentions that way.
The world tries to misconstrue the nice girl with good intentions into the naive girl, with hidden motives: the walked all over girl with no possibility of doing these things wanting nothing in return. The flirted with girl, who was being nice, so I might as well mess with her heart. The friendship girl, who’s closest friends cannot even fathom why in the world she would choose to break off a piece of her own heart to heal theirs. The now saddened girl appalled that the world would think so little of her Godly intentions.
For Godly purposes, come with all the things that the world hates: 100% pure motives, a humble heart, authentic character, and a genuine spirit. Reasons that never stop seeking for good in others, a heart that is so full of Christ it overflows in abundance, a character so real it shares its vulnerabilities with others, and a Spirit so dedicated to being this “nice girl” it presses on amidst the pushback and chaos. For the nice girl with good intentions will never actually be understood by the world, but the genuine nice girl with good intentions will carry on anyway. She will give until she can give no more, serve until her fingers are blistered and blue, smile until her face feels stuck in that position, and above all, imitate Christ until all who are lost have become found.
God sees the intricate fibers of your heart and the love that you so desperately want to lavish upon others. In fact, He sees these things not only because He instilled them within you to do so, but also because He was the “nice guy” with good intentions, highly misunderstood by the world.
“Did you see what Jesus did today?” I envision hearing the Pharisees snicker.
“Yeah, he healed a blind man” one of them mocked. “Wonder why he did that? Probably so He’d gain more followers,” he laughed as he rolled his eyes.
“Oh yeah” Judas chimes in; “He couldn’t possibly really love me, so why wouldn’t I trade in his insincerity for some gold coins?” He remarks planting his feet into the ground.
“But I did” replies the solid ground on which each of their feet is found. “I loved you so much that I did these things out of the good intentions and humbleness of my heart. Not expecting anything in return, but just offering you a chance to live life to the fullest with me” He resounds in whispers.
“Oh,” the Pharisees, Disciples, Judas, and World reply as their heads begin to look down towards the ground.
“I guess we didn’t understand your love,” they respond in unity.
“That’s okay,” Jesus replies with a smile as a small tear begins to roll down His face. “You didn’t have to understand it to receive it.”
For that’s the thing about nice girls and guys with sincere, and real, and honest intentions. The love that they give to other people can’t be bought, purchased, traded, or sold. It can’t be shut down, destroyed, tarnished, or even defeated. And why? Because the joy that they find in serving others comes from God, and “neither height, nor depth, nor anything else in creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus”, and is so evidently radiating out of both you and me (Romans 8:39).
So go ahead, be the nice girl with good intentions. Have a heart of humility that fully gives yourself for the sake of others. That places others needs above that of his or her own and loves unconditionally, even when you know that these good deeds will be done without getting anything in return.
Because I have to wonder, maybe the reason why you’ve placed these passions in me is due to the fact that they were first found in you. The world won’t be able to understand it- do it anyway.
“Humility and reverence for the Lord will make you both wise and honored”- Proverbs 15:33

Springhill Camps: When Conviction Turns Into Healing

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment
Springhill Camps: When Conviction Turns Into Healing
 

(Just a few of the beautiful kids that I got to work with this past week at Springhill)

Last year around this time, I never would’ve guessed that my summer would be as jam-packed with God’s goodness as it has been.  Going on a mission trip, competing at a national dance competition, writing for my school website and writing center, working at a kid’s camp, and overall, just going outside of my comfort zone, I am literally astonished at the growth that has taken place in my life within this very short period of time.
As I wrote about in the past few articles, multiple people keep telling me “I’ve changed.”  That my once OCD/perfectionist personality is being replaced with a charismatic, free-spirited, genuinely happy person, and to tell you the truth, it scares the living daylights out of me that I am becoming like this, but I couldn’t be happier and more in tune with the call that God has placed on my life.
Deciding to take risks this summer and finally try all of the things that I had been afraid to do in the past, the surmount of lessons God has revealed to me is growing.  Choosing to work at Springhill Camps with young children (when you aren’t really a “kid person”), for instance, marks the top of this list.
From a young age, I have basically grown up as an only child.  And outside of my two half brothers that I don’t see very often, children (other than my cousins or now nieces and nephews) besides myself were relatively nonexistent in the home.  As a result of this, you could say that I didn’t necessarily learn to not like children, but I wasn’t really around them enough to know.  In fact, my parents have even told me in laughter that since the age of two, they knew that I didn’t really want other kids around.  Asking me if I wanted a little brother or sister to play with, I sternly stated, “NO!” no matter how the question was proposed. 
“Amber, would you like a brother or sister to share ice-cream with?”
“No!”
“Amber, are you sure you don’t want a baby sibling?”
“No!”
“Amber, can we at least talk about…”
“No!” you get the idea.
But before you start getting some misconception about me being this terrible person that dislikes all kids all the time, let me set the record straight.  I don’t dislike little kids; I just connect better with older children (hence wanting to teach High School and College, aged students).  And in sincerity, I want to learn how to connect and love and be silly with younger kids, but it is a process that I am slowly working on.  So, with that being said, that is why despite my initial feelings, I chose to work at a children’s camp.  Not because I over the top wanted to, but because I knew that God was going to reveal some things to me that couldn’t be experienced anywhere else.
Arriving at my first day of camp in Dalton, Ohio, I was overjoyed, overwhelmed, and overexcited to say the least about my upcoming experiences.  Being welcomed by a generous team of kind-hearted, God-loving, and selfless-seeking individuals, the already established team of Counselors, welcomed me into their clan from day one and made me feel like part of the team.  This week, however, was certainly not easy as I suspected, and therefore, was proven to become one of the most challenging experiences that I have ever endured in my lifetime.
 

(Me and my new friend Emily are so silly.  Thumbs up for this family that provided wonderful food and hospitality)

From making new friends, to living with a fabulous host home, singing crazy camp songs 24/7 (can you say “LIKE A BANANA” enough?), and getting to serve as a light to over 75 kids, my week was certainly blessed, but at the same time, it was heartbreaking, convicting, and ever so gently healing.  When I witnessed a child with cerebral palsy going down a water slide with his counselor, for instance, I started crying as the kids at the bottom of the slide cheered for his victory.  Then, later that day when we got to share our testimonies with the campers, I couldn’t help myself from tearing up when I realized just how detrimental our impact meant to the establishment and resolution of their faith.  The silly skits that we sang became less about repetition and trying to remember the song and more about actually realizing their importance to this group that might not otherwise ever hear the Gospel.  The overwhelmingly loud and crazy contraptions of learning how to set-up, teardown, and engage with a Rockwall, Flying squirrel, Infiltration x, EuroBungy, and more helped me to separate concern for self, from concern for others.  And above all, the constant noise of childlike giggles, major chaos, and unforeseen circumstances of craziness taught me to trade in my orderly conducts of ducks in a row for a more adventurous, life-filled and child-like faith set of endeavors
 

(The awesome team that I got to work with, feat Christmas in July festivities) 

When my Dad then picked me up from camp to go home, he, his mom’s neighbor, and my nephew welcomed me with glistening eyes while pondering eager questions as to how my trip went.  “What were the kids like?” the neighbor inquired.  “Why didn’t I get to go?” questioned my nephew.  “Are you tired?” asked my Dad. 
Beginning to drift in and out of focused thoughts and dreams through the clear glass window, my nephew tapped my arm, and despite my overwhelming tiredness, he continued to ask me questions.  But instead of saying I didn’t want to talk, or simply being short with my answers like normal, I pushed myself and began to treat him like one of my camper’s.  Singing songs at the top of my lungs, giggling hysterically, and playing along through skits, I had never seen so much joy light up in his eyes as they similarly reflected in mine.  Never before had I had so much fun with my nephew as he questioned, “Why are you like this Amber?” and God’s conviction hit me head on. 
As I tried to shake off the feeling and understand these changes that were occurring in me, it is no surprise that when I got home at 11:30 p.m. that Friday night, my body and soul were drained physically, mentally, socially, emotionally, and spiritually in more ways than I could ever explain in words.  With a broken voice from yelling, watering eyes from emotions, and a heart that was weary, I could do nothing but weep into my mother’s loving arms.  And why?  Because for the first time in my life I realized the pure joy that children bring and how seeing this world that we live in through their lenses can make all the difference; a conviction’s worth of a difference.
Giving all that I could this past week made me realize not only how much I should be honoring these children of God, but also how much I have not treated them in a way that Jesus would call me to.  Of course, I have never been unkind to them or rude intentionally, but specifically to the children in my family, I have tended to avoid them, think they were annoying, and get jealous of their presence since a very young age.  And this is wrong, and I know it is wrong, but never have I been convicted so much in realization to see that how I acted this past week was how I should be treating these children in my life all along.  I have an opportunity to share Jesus with them, and if I fail to do that for selfish reasons, that certainly does nothing for my character.  But likewise, just because I have realized this flaw doesn’t mean that it is going to be an immediate change.  Certainly though, what it does mean is that from here on out, I am going to try my best to keep this spirit with me when I interact with children.
If God loved me enough to die for my life, I should be willing be to like Jesus to these kids (as He asks us to) regardless of whether I am a kid person or not.  And though it took everything out of me to be that way, I want to become that silly and carefree person that acted like a child, for “the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to those” who embody that childlike Spirit.  Because God opened my eyes to see the world through his filter and I wept as I realized that these children are GOD’s and SO VALUABLE in his eyes. Though it was so HARD for me to be loud and crazy all week, just knowing the joy we brought to them as God asks us to was humbling.
Despite these convictions, I began to fully comprehend that Jesus cares about these children and so should I, but I don’t know how.  I don’t know how to be crazy all the time and contain so much patience that when the 15th kid in a row asks to go to the bathroom, you don’t mutter, but just smile, nod, and take them.  But I want to know how and so this has become my prayer.
And in all honesty, I might never be a “kid person” that can talk to them, be silly, and have never-ending patience with ease.  But what I do know is that with God’s mighty hand, diligent answers to prayer, and strength, I will learn to be.   I will learn to be silly, I will learn to be carefree, and I will learn to be a light.  Because this past week and even this past entire summer, I have no idea how I have done what I have and if it weren’t for God, I wouldn’t be to the place where I am now. But if these experiences, in summary, have revealed anything to me, they have revealed this; that this person I am becoming is just a discovery of my true self and who God created me to be. 
It has dawned on me that I am notthis OCD person I once thought I was, nor am I the confines of that box that people have tried to put me in. I am SO MUCH MORE than what the WORLD sees and what I have allowed myself to embody based on their misconceptions of that.
So today, it is my prayer that God will continue to reveal to me the sincerity of who I really am and how I am called to love His children regardless of the measures that it entails.  That I will not only keep this patience and apply the happy spirit that I learned this week to the rest of my life, but learn to truly reflect the still small child that now looks at me for guidance, prompting for the little girl inside of me to reply.  
So as she stutters to find her words, the little girl speaks: Conviction comes with healing, and to that path, though it may come with trials and hardships, you will soon be complete.
 

(Me and my nephew Levi feat Amber’s dance competition makeup, and emoji-filled faces)

Agape, Amber

We’re All Broken

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment
We’re all Broken
 

(We are all broken, but it is okay; that’s how the light gets in)

Just a little over two months I learned something about brokenness that not only made me study myself a little bit more, but analyze others and get a glimpse into the truth that maybe when everyone says “Yeah, I’m okay”, they are further from okay than a girl claiming that “Things are fine”.  More specifically, I have learned that sometimes when we think we know a person, we only see their outer surface layer and that their true self is still hidden behind depths, mounds, and leaps of struggles, insecurities, guilt, and sin, disguised by the realities of built up walls, overthought perceptions, and lack of self-worth; myself included.
When someone hurts you, for instance, we as Christian’s are taught to turn the other cheek, forgive the person, and move on with our lives.  But brokenness caused by a hurting heart, crushed soul, and inferior look in the mirror can take a person quite a bit longer than a simple flip of the cheek to get over.  Speaking from personal experience, I knew these feelings very well, and it wasn’t until my mother revealed to me that holding onto them and constantly telling every new person I met about them, really wasn’t any way to live. “Amber, by bringing up that hurt time and time again, you are not allowing yourself to heal, and until you truly stop thinking about it and letting it influence everything you do, your heart will always be attached to strings that end in pain.”
Yet even time you see doesn’t heal all wounds; God does.  And if we are being honest, we are all broken in some way, shape, or form, but in sharing our brokenness with others, we can be made whole.  Let me state that again.  Just because you are broken doesn’t mean that you have to act like your life is a perfectly glued together pottery art when it isn’t.  It also doesn’t mean that you have to spill your guts about your past and how this person or that hurt you to every single person.  But it does mean that in understanding we are all broken, meaning we all struggle with things in the past, present, or future that cause us to become shard pieces of glass, we can help each other to heal.  We can reveal to these true friends and realistic people that we are humans with flaws as real as the granola pieces stuck in our braces, or the white mark of deodorant on our little black dresses.  Because my friends, no matter how these things measure or compare to the worldly views surrounding us, I would choose genuine, authentic, and true people with of all their flaws included rather than a person that appears perfect on the outside, but doesn’t know how to reveal their character on the inside.
And yes, if you are wondering, even I once fell to the claims of this scheme that the world professes.  I thought that I really knew people when in reality, I only knew who I thought they were, and what they portrayed on the outside wasn’t anything that they truly were at the core.  I viewed these perfectly looking, feeling, and acting people as goals to look up to and become, but were they actually happy?  Were their polished Christian characters as real as they made them seem?  Were their inabilities to profess any flaws humble or striking?  Was their love for God measured by their lifted hands and charming voices or even real after all? I would like to think so, but the only person who knows that would be themselves and God.
I met a great friend this past year, and they can’t even begin to compare to some of the people that I called “my friends” in the past.  They care about me for who I am, not who they want me to be, and more importantly, their love for God is so real that I never have to question their authenticity.  Sharing vulnerable information with me, and I choosing to do the same, I feel like this person let me break down some of their walls, and in return, they broke down some of mine.  Because isn’t that what true friendship is all about?  Learning to become whole again by helping each other to glue those broken pieces back together?
I have heard it said in Japan that when a pot gets broken the people don’t discard its contents.  Instead, they piece it back together with a priceless gold because something that has now suffered some type of damage has a history that makes it all the more beautiful.  And why?  Because this once whole pot has now become whole again by sharing its brokenness with the world, and perhaps we as humans are meant to do the same.  To share a little brokenness with others in the hopes that we will find someone just as broken as us, that together can make something whole.

“We are all a little broken [my dear,] but that’s how the light gets in”- Ernest Hemingway

Agape, Amber 

You’ve Changed

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment
You’ve changed
(Who cares if I’m laughing and look silly! At least I am being authentic:))

  Over the past few months, I have had quite a few people tell me that “I’ve changed”, and by quite a few, I mean the majority of those that I interact with.
“Amber, what do your plans look like for the next few weeks?” Jeanie asked.
“Well, I just got back from dance nationals and before that, a Mission Trip to Indiana, and you wouldn’t believe what happened. There was no schedule and I had no idea what I was going to do each day until that day arrived, but somehow, I was COMPLETELY okay with it?  Then, next week I leave for a camp where I will work with K-6th grade, the following week I have work, and the week after that I go back to the same camp.  I was also supposed to also go on a Mission Trip to Puerto Rico, but that trip got cancelled, which is okay because I have Small Group and Hall Chaplin training for the college anyways” I replied calmly.
“Who are you?” she laughed.
“What do you mean?” I giggled.
“I mean am I really talking to Amber?” Jeanie inquired.
“Of course ha-ha, but I do feel quite different” I replied.
“That’s because you’ve changed, but I’ve never been prouder of you” Jeanie gleamed.
  That’s the conversation I had with my best friend’s mom just a few week’s ago when I went over to her house.  Knowing me for around 12 years, she is familiar with the type of individual I am, and going from place to place all summer just isn’t me.  As a homebody who loves her family, this is the first summer that I’ve been so involved, and I guess it just appeared to be a bit shocking.
Now normally, I would think that if someone said I had changed, this would be in a bad frame of mind.  Generally speaking, when those around you say that so and so have changed, it tends to be for the worse, rather than the better.  This person started ignoring you, that guy changed his attitude, and so on.  However, at this point in my life, I truly believe that I have changed for the better.
Have my looks changed?  Well, not really.  I am still around 5’6” and thin, with brown hair, blue eyes, and the occasional bun on top of my head.  Have my activities changed?  Also, not so much, I still run, dance, sing, play piano, write, hike, and more.  But has how I live my life from day to day changed?  Absolutely.
  When I think about the person I was a year or two ago, I cannot believe the person that I am now, compared to where I used to be.  Two years ago, I was a sophomore in college, broke my foot from dancing, and had very few to any real friends.  One year ago, I was a junior in college, and although I finally found that true group of friends to click with, I still spent the majority of my time going OCD crazy, or worrying about the next quiz I had to take in class.  So, with all of that being said, where am I now?
  Now, I am in the summer after my junior year, before my senior year begins, and I barely recognize the girl looking back at me in the mirror.  Sure, she looks the same on the outside, but I cannot tell you how much different the lion roaring inside of her now is.  This girl that used to be afraid to step outside of her comfort zone is pushing herself to the limits.  This woman of God that was allowing fear to creep into every fabric of her being through worrying and perfectionism is now subsiding.   This OCD, crazy plannerized being still loves to have order, and know what she is doing when, but when she doesn’t haven’t a schedule, she is no longer freaking out about the things that are beyond her control.
  Because sure, I still have days when I like to stay tidy and make my bed before I leave to go classes.  In fact, I still love having a schedule, and making one to ensure that I don’t over commit myself or be where I am supposed to at just the right time.  Yes, I still show up to college classes 10 minutes early, and you better bet that I carry that highlighted planner around with me everywhere I go, but you know what I don’t do?  I don’t try to change life, and circumstances, and surroundings to fit the mold that I want it to.  I don’t skip out on hanging out with friends because it is going to interfere with my inflexible schedule.  And more importantly, I don’t try to tell God how my life is going to go inside of my comfort zone bubble, because I know that what He has in store for me beyond that popped bubble is far greater than anything I could ever ask or imagine.  Is it going to be scary, absolutely?  Will I most likely freak out the day before I have to leave that comfy zone, probably so?  But will I doubt the goodness that He has for my life when I finally learn to give Him control, never again?

  I am learning to allow God to put back together the pieces of this broken puzzle, even if that means not understanding what He is doing along the way.  To love this new person that I am becoming, and understand that just because parts of me have changed, that doesn’t mean that I am losing myself, it merely means that I am finally becoming who He has called me to be all along; a woman who trusts in the Lord with all of her heart, even enough to leave the things that she once thought defined her.

20 and Free

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment
(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: The Sun is setting)

I have learned to accept who I am and who I am not and it may have taken all nineteen years leading up to my Birthday to figure that out, but you know what; that is okay! Okay? Yes, okay because I am still learning to love who I am amidst the things that life throws at me.

Today for instance, I turn 20. It isn’t so much the number that freaks me out or the notion that I’m no longer a teenager but, the associations and standards that come with the prime of the age. The responsibilities, the expected relationships, the jobs, the stress, the “I’m getting old trend” facade; they all petrify me.  Why? Because I know that regardless of what I do I’m going to have to blow another candle off the cake as the years go by and before I know it, this short life of mine will be over before I took the time to truly enjoy it.

So how exactly, can such a small double digit number instill so much fear and pain into one tremulous soul? Because we as humans have a problem of trying to compare our milestones and destinations in life to that of our friends, families and movie stars. Have you ever heard the quote “Don’t compare you page one to their page fifty”? Sadly, it is easy to say but much harder to do.

We get into the rut of believing that because so and so has had three boyfriends and we’re still single that something scares us about increasing in age.  The rut of believing that because our parents had jobs by the age of twenty or were married and had kids by twenty-five that something is wrong with us if we don’t follow that trend. And you know what, it is absolutely, one hundred percent terrifying to live with. To live with the fear that we won’t be loved by some superficial person, or will be passed by by every good looking and Godly Christian man that we meet. To live with that fear that we won’t meet the crazed up standards that society throws at us portrayed by movie stars when our hair isn’t perfect, our makeup isn’t “on fleek”, and our bodies don’t have six pack. But newsflash, reality of society, my hair definitely isn’t perfect and I don’t wear makeup. In fact, I’m sure the fashion police would give me ticket and fine me for not being able to get my four pack to six pack and in all honestly, that’s seriously messed up.

Messed up in the fact that we as human beings let these drones of a so called perfect society tell us how to live our lives. To warp our minds into believing that if we aren’t 5’9″ and 100 lbs. we aren’t worthy of a good rating on the scales. To deceive our hearts and minds into feeling that we are invaluable for never dating anyone by the age of twenty or never wanting to give our purity away because it means more than a one night stand to us. Encompassing our souls into a sultry of self-hatred and pity by trying to live up to the worlds standards of Victoria’s Secret models, and partied up friends instead of that of God’s and His set apart standard for you. And that is the last and final straw pulled for me; I am done.

I am done comparing my page one love story (that hasn’t even began yet) to that of the sex-filled and obsessed society of Lifetime movie scenes (no offense Lifetime, I love your movies, just minus the society you try to portray through romance and one night stand sex scenes of temporary pleasure).

I am done comparing my body, mind and soul to that of this sickening mainstream of secular ways, trends and vibes. Of seeing people starve themselves to become “beautiful” in the eyes of who? The lying mirror or stick thin models who whisper through their hunger ridden clenched teeth. Of crying at the mirror when I get a zit because I believe that is the only thing people will see through the airbrushed filter of faces and scenes. Of seeing people crying themselves to sleep at night because they can’t love themselves and the way they have been made just because society doesn’t approve of their bodies. Of seeing people infect their minds with porn and late night superficial television shows that etch away at their brain cells every time they change the channel. Or their eyes as they bleed tears of shame that their Instagram photo didn’t get enough likes by the fake friends that can’t even talk to them in person. Of the soul that people have gained by trying to gain the world in the process and forfeiting their souls.

I am done seeing other people become judgmental and letting them make me become judgmental of myself in comparison to others. Of allowing Christian’s to think that it is okay to slack off once and awhile and judge that person that they didn’t like because “oh I was just kidding” gets real old real fast after a while. And believing that they are superior to the rest of humanity instead of coming to the lowest pits that they can in an attempt to save those “judgmental people” that they shouldn’t have been judging in the first place.

Above all, I am done listening to a world that lies so much in telling me who I should and shouldn’t be. Because in all honesty, I’ve listened to the lies but never believed them; for I know the value that I am in Christ. I’m done seeing other people fall captive to these fallacies and allowing them to rule their lives of who Christ created them to be.

So today, I am making the choice to help myself and others accept who they are by reflecting on a few things about myself that society does not approve of.  To accept the quips and quirks that God blessed me with and rest in His assurance that He has great plans for me; because he does. Standing firm in the design that He has made me with and learning to trust His process throughout the journey.


1) I am a Christian in an ungodly world



(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Biblical Truths)

Getting saved at the prime age of eight years old at 2:00a.m in the morning has caused me to avoid quite a bit of heartache in my life.  I’ve never had the desire to smoke, do drugs, party, or get in with the wrong crowd.

But I have suffered from a broken heart.  And I have grown up with a Dad that is addicted to cigarettes and family members addicted to drugs and parities of the wrong crowds. But still, I am a Christian in an ungodly world.  I believe in Christ and the life he shed for me on the cross.  I believe in living my life for Him and only Him because that is the least of things I can do in reprimand of all He gave to me. Yes, I am surrounded every day by this ungodly world, but I choose to stand firm on the solid rock of Christ and His ways.

2) I am different

(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Yes, that is underwear on my head;))

Christ tells us in Romans 12:2 “Do not change yourselves to be like the people of this world, but let God change you inside with a new way of thinking.  Then you will be able to understand and accept what God wants for you.  You will be able to know what is good and pleasing to Him and what is perfect” (Romans 12:2, ERV).

I know that I was created for God, by God to live as a unique individual in the world that surrounds me.  After all, in point one, you can see that I am a Christian in an ungodly world.  However, by appreciating and accepting that God has made me different, I can embody the Spirit of Christ that fills me with joy and happiness in all that I am called to do.

So yes, I know that I am different, but as a Christian, that is who God has created and asked me to be.  To stand apart from this troubled world that surrounds me, and let the light of Christ shine through me means that I am brave enough to recognize that I am different, and encourage others to do the same.
 
3) I am OCD



Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.  Although I personally know that I don’t really have OCD, everyone in my life loves to give me a hard time about it and tell me that I am.  I honestly, don’t have a medical disorder that classifies me as this, but I do like to be a tad bit organized, and this drives my parents insane.


At first when they would say things to me about it they would really hurt my feelings.  “Amber, you’re too organized”, “Amber, you’re too OCD”, “Amber, you’re anal” (yeah that one hurt).  But you know what? I forgive them and it is okay that I like to be organized.  After all, that is just a part of who I am.  I know that it may drive them a little bit crazy, but deep down I think they know what would be even more crazy is if I randomly one day didn’t care if my bed was made or my clothes weren’t folded nice and neat.  Hmmm, maybe I should try and freak them out one day with stir-crazy tendencies; that could be quite interesting 😉


For I am and always will be organized because it is something that I love and enjoy to do.  And regardless of what other people think, it will always be a part of me.

4) I am imperfect/ flaws

(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Our hands show Creation)
 
 
Yes, you read that one hundred percent correctly.  I am imperfect.  I am flawed.  But aren’t we all? Romans 3:23 tells us this in which “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” because the only perfect being in this world is God.
I am not perfect, your best friend isn’t perfect, your loving parents aren’t perfect, and even the movie stars and models on TV that look like they have the best lives are not perfect.  Society likes to deceive our minds into thinking that they have it all together, but in reality they really don’t.
We are all sinful, prideful and imperfect flawed human beings but we are loved by a sinless, pride less, and perfect Almighty God.  Coming to the realization that we are these things is important to our success because it is only when we learn that we can’t do things on our own (because we are imperfect) that we learn to depend fully on Jesus Christ who is.
 5) I am a writer
(Photo Credit: Rachel Barnitz, 2016: I write you with memories of the past)


Obviously by reading this post you can tell that I love to write.  I always have and I always will, but I haven’t always enjoyed or been thankful for the gift.  Throughout High School I was made fun of a lot for being the kid that wrote way more than necessary.  And in all honesty, it started to eat me alive.
I would try to write less on assignments, but when I did, I felt as if I were losing a part of myself, because I was.  Quickly that trying to write less phase only lasted a few hours; call me a wimp if you want, but that day, I learned a lot about myself.
God gave me this gift of writing and overwriting to express who I am through words when I don’t have the voice to speak.  To proclaim His word to all the nations and not be afraid of someone telling me that “I wrote too much about Jesus” because wouldn’t that be a great crime to be convicted of? I am a writer, and it is something that etches me into who I am meant to be.

 

6) I am a singer/ musician

(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: It’s all in perspective)

 

 

 
Pretty self-explanatory, but I really enjoy singing.  Rather it be helping lead the Praise Team every Sunday or singing “And IIIIIIIIIIIIIIII WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOUUUUUUUU” at the top of my lungs on Saturday night’s with my mom (#thisiswhyI’msingle), singing is something that I really enjoy to do.
Thus, I believe that God has blessed me with the gift of singing and playing music to go along with my writing, because it is another way I can reach people through Him.  I often tell others that anything they see in me isn’t me, but Christ through me, because I rely on Him and His power alone.  I always sing for Christ and not the approval of man, in which I hope others can see this strikingly. Never a performance, but an act of worship brought in humbleness to Him.
7) I am a runner
(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Me and my brother showing off our muscles)
 
When I first tried to run as a sophomore in High School, I was treacherous.  My ankles turned purple and I couldn’t run, but I still consider myself a runner.  After a few years of great help from best friends, I now really enjoy running about as much as I enjoy writing, singing, playing piano, and dancing because it helps me to take time and thank God for all that He has given me.
As I run, I like to take the time to reflect on all that has happened that day and pray to God because what else are you honestly going to do for an hour but pray, and look at the sky or face of your watch up from the treadmill. For Hebrew 12:2 tells us, “Let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith” (Hebrew 12:2).
We are all runners in the race of life, but it is up to you to run towards the prize of Christ. I know which direction I’m headed, but do you?
8) I am a fitness and health nut fanatic
(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Pretty sure me and my Best Friend are crazy)
 
 

Going hand and hand with the topic of running, I probably enjoy fitness and health facts a lot more than I should.  Who else do you honestly know that enjoys working out and staying fit as the best part of their day? Yeah, I didn’t think you would really think of anyone, but that’s just another part of who I am.

I enjoy staying fit and being a health nut fanatic even if I do drive my mom a little bit crazy sometimes.  And don’t worry, I do like some things that aren’t too health like Nutella, and cereal, and granola, and oh don’t get me started. FOOD!!!!


9) I am sensitive


(Photo Credit: Rachel Barnitz, 2016: A Rose By Any Other Name)
 



I probably cry or overreact on average more than you have in your lifetime.  Okay, well maybe that is a bit of an exaggeration, I am not that big of a bowl of fruit loops (did you see what I did their 😉 ) but I do tend to be a bit sensitive. I am a girl that loves God and sometimes I tend to get a bit emotional about the silliest things like romance movies, or Austin and Ally episodes that make me tear up, but I am learning to slowly accept this trait. Just be prepared for lots of hugs and condolences in the meantime.

10) I am colorful

(Photo Credit and Painting Credit: Rachel Barnitz, 2016: With and Without Christ)

 

In a dark and gloomy world, I try to embody a colorful spirit that shines through in all that I say and do.  For it can be depressing to look out and see a world of gray and black as a person of coral, and turquoise but standing confident in Christ I am colorful in a colorless world. In Christ the world is vivid, colorful, bright and stunning, but without Him it is empty and damp. Why would you choose a box of all gray, black and white crayons when you could have a multipack for the same price?

11) I am pure

(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: A Pure Heart)

 

Living I a world that believes highly in sex before marriage, sex at a one night stand, and who knows, probably sex on a first date is utterly disheartening.  In the sexually immoral and obsessed society we live in, it seems that everything in this world is either about sex, love or money.  We either want to make more money, have someone to love us, or have sex every minute of the day.  The billboards scream it, the TV commercial’s show it, the radio sings it, and sadly we portray it.  Through our actions, our words, our clothes and our deeds, but we want to be socially acceptable don’t we?  Yet Christ wants so much more for us in this scheme. He wants us to see that staying pure is more than just waiting to have sex until we are married, because once we are married and have lost that virginity, it doesn’t make us any less pure.

 

Sex is not to be something that we as Christian’s or people in general, should place on this large pedestal.  It is not this thing that should control and demand gratification in our lives, obsessing our thoughts, actions and being every single second.  No, sex is something that is given to us by God as a gift between a married couple, and by goodness gracious, it doesn’t make you “any less pure of a person”.

You see, the emphasis of purity should not be confused with that of virginity in our minds.  And as Christian’s, we need to realize that purity is less about sex, and more about saving ourselves (our entireties; not just our sex life status) for Christ.  Because when I get married someday, I still want to be known as the best Christian person that I can become; not the person that lost their pureness of virginity on their wedding night.  We as the Church and body of Christ should be more about saving souls and less about condemning them.  More about the wholeness found in Christ and less about why having sex is so frowned upon.

For purity isn’t all about the purity ring we as Christian’s wear and proudly profess on our hands and remove after we are married. The pursuit of purity is a lifelong pursuit that has a whole lot more to do with Christ and a whole lot less about your sex life. No, I am not saying to not save sex until marriage, because I do believe in that value, but I am saying to reevaluate this pedestal of placement we have placed on purity and the reflection it has on your life. Because purity in the end of it all isn’t just all about sex.

I am pure, and I will not submit to the values that this society deems as found through sex.  I will not give myself away like that because I value my purity more than the temporary pleasure of the movie star sex plastered on the billboards.


12) I am modest

(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Modesty is Honesty)

Because I am a Christian, I value my modesty just as much as I value my purity for one reflects the other.  I will not conform to the social standard and norm of inappropriate dressing, in which girls dress immodestly just be noticed by the wrong guys. But I have news for you girls, you shouldn’t dress to gain those guys attention.
 


 
13) I am crazy
(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter: Okay, so I might be a little crazy)
 
 

Well, maybe not too crazy, but I can be a bit strange here and there, and like to spice up life once in a great while. I am my own soundtrack in life, and don’t listen to the sounds that society shouts loudly in our stereos.  I am my own person, and if that entails singing silly songs with my mom and not liking chocolate chip cookies then so be it. Embrace the craziness.

14) I am a daisy in a field of roses

(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: I know this isn’t a daisy, but just deal with it!)
I once read this quote that said “And if you don’t like me, as I do; I understand because who would really choose a daisy, in a field of roses?” and I used to agree with it however, it recently hit.  What is wrong with being a daisy in a field of roses? Nothing, nothing at all. Because amidst all the other copycat roses in this life, I would rather stand out as a beautiful daisy than blend in with the rest of the crowd.

15) I am an antisocialmedia median

(Photo Credit and Drawing Credit: Kasandra Dalton, 2016: That’s me, away from all the Media!!!)

 
In other words, I don’t really like Social Media but I do exist upon its networking sites.  I like to imagine that I too can make this disappearing decade come back to life.  To make you realize that this disguise of social media can cause us to lose a sense of community, a sense of who others really are, and most importantly who we are in Christ.
No, I am not asking you to give up social media at all, or never use; in fact that would be quite preposterous to ask.  However, I am asking you to realize that if we don’t start a change of revolution now, our world will become nothing but a self-gratifying, self-centered life.
Because sometimes some things are just too beautiful to capture in life.  Some things are just too beautiful to capture in a photo.  And some things just deserve our eyes, and nothing else.
          Not a picture
          Not a “like”
          Not a flash on the screen
But a breath of fresh air with just you and that thing.

16) I am a dancer
(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Yes, those are my large and skinny dancing feet!)
Up until I broke my foot about a month ago, I have danced every day since the age of 3 years old.  It is something that I love doing and using my body to give thanks to God while praising Him. Whenever I move through the air I just imagine dancing for Jesus with all that I have because all to Him I truly owe.
 
17) I am a servant with a heart for volunteering
(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Give others your helping hand and heart)
 
 

 

Ever since I was a very little girl, I have had a passion for helping others to not only grow within their own capacities but also in their capabilities through and in Christ.  From volunteering at the Humane Society for over six year, to hosting weekly Bible Studies, going to the nursing home, hosting FCA meetings, creating a girl’s singing group, and more, the desire I have had for improving other’s lives is often at the detriment of my own success, but that is okay; for it is what Christ calls each of us to do.

18) I am me

(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Ironic, this is the 18th fact, I was 18 here and at 20 I still look like this!)

Amber is the name, tree sap is the definition, and I am slowly learning to love myself the way that I should. I am the old fashioned soul that wakes you up at night.  The photographs you take in the summer of the sunrises and sunsets.  The words that you whisper when you talk to yourself.  I am Amber, and I am no one else but me.

19) I am becoming who God has called me to be

(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: Favorite Bible verse inspired by Rachel Barnitz)

 
Throughout the twenty years that I’ve been living, I have learned that I’ve gained a lot of knowledge about life.  In fact, I’ve listed them here in these top twenty things that I’ve been able to inquire about myself.  But no matter what I’ve grown to understand as the passing years go by, I know that I am following the right path and becoming who God has called me to be.

20) For I am (trying to be) fearless of turning 20 today and I am free.
(Photo Credit: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2016: I am FREE indeed)


A Deadly Comparison

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment
2 Corinthians 10:12 NLT states,
“Oh, don’t worry; we wouldn’t dare say that we are as wonderful as these other men who tell you how important they are! But they are only comparing themselves with each other, using themselves as the standard of measurement. How ignorant!”
 
  Today I am going to be talking about the two main concepts of comparison and how we as Christians can learn to live in a world where it seems finding the faults in others becomes the discretion of finding our strengths. Comparison is seen as a destroyer of joy, and our personality only truly begins when we stop comparing ourselves to others.
 
  First, and foremost, “Comparison is the thief of joy.”
(All Rights Belong To Photographer: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2015)
As stated by Theodore Roosevelt, comparison can be seen as the thief of joy because it robs us of today’s successes, and tomorrow’s victories.  If we are constantly thinking about how much prettier, smarter, more athletic, and talented someone else is, our mind forgets the personal successes we have obtained for ourselves today.  For example, as a dancer, I constantly have the battle of thinking that the other girls in class are more talented than me, but the reality of it is we all have our own strengths and weaknesses.  And more importantly by engaging in this type of mentality, I am comparing myself to others and their standards instead of God, and who He wants me to be.
(All Rights Belong To Photographer: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2015)
  In fact, as the Bible states in the verse we looked at earlier, “by comparing ourselves to others, and using them as a standard of measurement this only makes us ignorant” to what God has in store for us today, and the plans He prospers for us tomorrow. But in looking to God as our comparison and letting that embodiment surround our mind and thoughts, we can begin to restore the joy that has been taken from us, and see those successes and victories He gives us every single day.  When we learn that it is not the earthly persons, objects and morals we should be looking at, but God and His realm of Heavenly perfections comparison will no longer be seen as a thief of joy, but a reflection of becoming more like God.
  Second, “personality begins where comparison leaves off”.
As stated and paraphrased by Shannon Adler, finding our true personality can only be found when we leave the comparison of others behind.  Think about it.  Being created by a God who made you as a unique, special, and loving individual, we are not exactly like anyone else in the world.  Sure, there may be people who are similar to you, look like you, or act like you, but no one is really you, but you.  Someone will always be taller, skinner, or smarter than you, but guess what? That is okay! You were created to be the personality of someone that reflects you and no one else.  Not the girl with the so called “perfect body” or the guy with the “six pack that can run a mile in three minutes”.  But an individual with your own quips and quirks of a disposition that only you have the ability to define.
  Don’t worry about saying how wonderful and important other men are as 2 Corinthians 10:12 states, for that will only lead you to ignorance and a life of despair.
  So in summary, don’t let comparison be the thief of your joy, or the identity of your personality.  Walk on the path of least resistance that helps you to become more like God, and learn that the only one you need to be comparing yourself to is Him, and who He wants you to become.
(All Rights Belong To Photographer: Amber Nicole Ginter, 2015)
  

Tuesday Tip #2

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment

Forgiveness isn’t just a word.

Forgiveness.  An eleven lettered word that means a whole lot more than simply giving a grace period to someone that has hurt, or abandoned you.  A word that doesn’t just mean pardoning the action, or accepting what happened, but more so an expression of knowing that you have to let it go. 
(Photo Credit To Photographer: Rachel Barnitz)
 
It doesn’t mean that you have to expose your heart to get hurt again.  It doesn’t mean that what they did was right or wrong.  But it does mean that we must learn to look past the pain, the hurt, the heartache, and the suffering to truly forgive. 

(Photo Credit To Photographer: Amber Nicole Ginter)
However, forgiveness is not immediate, although it is necessary.  Forgiveness is required, but it takes time.  Forgivenessis taken for granted, until we need it most.  But then it really hit me. 

When God died on the cross for our sins, He gave us the ultimatesacrifice of forgiveness.  He wasn’t thinking about if it was necessary, because He knew it was.  He wasn’t thinking if it was required, or would take time, because He was giving itat that very moment.  An eye wasn’t blinked as to if we deserved it or not, or would accept it when it was given.  It just was.

(Photo Credit To Photographer: Rachel Barnitz)
So then why do we as humans have to ponder at the fact to forgivewhen it should be a simple decision?  Why do we replay the events in our mind over and over again like a rolling television screen?  Because we are not God!  We are human, and have faults just like everyone else that need forgiven.  And if we are so apt to having others forgive us, shouldn’t we be willing to do the same for them?

Because when it all boils down to it, to forgive or to not forgive is the question we must ask ourselves.  For if Christ was willing to forgive us for all of our dirty, secret, hidden sins, we should reflect that grace and mercy onto others- even when they don’t deserve it.  It can be a difficult concept, I know.  But continuing to think negatively about that person every time you see them isn’t letting go.  And nor is letting that feeling of hatred affect every single thing that you do.

(Photo Credit To Photographer: Rachel Barnitz)
For all the people that have hurt you, have you truly forgiventhem?  And to all the people that have ever hurt me, sometimes it just takes time.  I forgive you, but you have to give me time for the wounds to heal.  It may be weeks, it may be months, it may even take years, but just like forgiveness takes time to heal, so do I.

(Photo Credit To Photographer: Amber Ginter and Artist: Kasandra Dalton)

Tuesday Tip #1

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment

And if NOT, HE is still good

*   So even if the sun and moon decide not to rise- He is still good.



(All rights reserved to Photographer: Rachel Barnitz) 
*   If your life seems messy and imperfect, take a deep breath- He is still good.

(All rights reserved to Photographer: Amber Nicole Ginter)
*   When you fight with your parents, and feel that your friends have left you all alone, fear not- He is still good.

(All rights reserved to Photographer: Rachel Barnitz)
  Because even if the sun and moon fail us, and our messy, imperfect lives get way out of control, and even if our families and friends abandon us, we must remember that God never will.  In the end of it all- He is still good.

✞And if not… He is still good…Daniel 3:18 ✞



(All rights reserved to Photographer: Amber Nicole Ginter. 2015. )

Through The Looking Glass

On By Amber GinterLeave a comment

Through The Looking Glass

(Copyright Belongs To Photographer: Rachel Barnitz)

Admit it. We’ve all been there.  We’ve all done it.

You get up in the morning and immediately think, “Wow am I looking attractive this morning or what?” Sarcasm kicks in and I’m sure that was probably very far from what you were actually thinking.  In fact, if you are like me, or the majority of 18 almost 19 something teenagers into young adults, you don’t wake up thinking you are hot stuff.

Crawling out of bed after hitting the 6:15 a.m. snooze button a few times, you make your way to the bathroom to see what kind of creature has appeared this morning.  Now let’s see, my hair looks like a bird decided to have its babies and make a nest on top, while my face has an imprint where I accidentally slept on my arm. The perfection of my skin is close to zero, while you know I’ve always wished my teeth could be whiter after years of braces.  The list of imperfections and degrading compliments could go on and on, but only if you choose to allow them.

It can be hard not to conform to the ignominious patterns of today’s pop culture, deathly scary appearances, and picture perfect miens.  I mean seriously, look at the world we live in today, at this very day, age and moment. The TV screens show off the latest top models with perfected angles and views.  Music industries blow out your ear drums with the notion that we have to be like them in order to fit in.  We think we have to have the perfect teeth, hair, skin, body, and nails to be accepted and loved.  But this is one truth, that is etched into society and should more accurately be known as a wretched lie.

I’m not going to sugar coat my life for you, and tell you that I always think I am beautiful, or perfect because in reality it would be the quite opposite.  However, when I come across these deepest times in my life, where I question my beauty, my looks, my imperfect perfections as a perfectionist, I realize that it really doesn’t matter what the majority of this humanity thinks.  Yes, it does matter what I think about myself, and it should not be self-humiliating, painfully inflicting comments, the Devil says is true, but more importantly, it matters what God thinks.

Yes, I am one of those Jesus freaks, and I don’t mean to offend anyone by it, but when I write, I write about God and the beautiful, magical, mysterious conceptions he has conceived into the Earth we live.  I find that it can be so encouraging to know that someone loves you more than anyone on this planet could ever fathom.  That someone thinks you are beautiful and loved and perfect in His eyes.  That we were created in His image, to become more and more divine.  Not to become God himself or all powerful over His authority, but so we could and can become the beautiful beings He created us to be.

You see, I find it more accurate to proclaim that when we look at the image of ourselves, we immediately pick at our flaws instead of pointing out our specialties.  It becomes easier to damage our image than build it up with compliments.  To look into the looking glass staring back at you and see a mess of imperfections rather than a masterpiece created in the image of God, like God.  We begin to think if we could just be thinner, or taller, or prettier, or more athletic, or crazier then the society would learn to accept us.  And I hope not to be the first to burst that bubble. To make that dream of perfection come crashing down, but I want you to realize one small truth:

When you look into that mirror, you are only looking at a poor reflection of who you really are.  Do you realize that you have never actually seen yourself, just a picture or image portrayed in things you have looked at?  God is the only one who should define and make an impact on the meaning of your true beauty.  He is our Creator and we are merely His creation.  The God who took so much time and care to create you uniquely and individually different than anyone else in the entire world, should not deserve to see you bashing on His work.

In the image of God, it is not the outward beauty that matters.  For when a cup is used, you must wash the inside of the cup first, and then the outside, because the inside is what holds that which matters most.  Just like our human bodies, we must first learn to be beautiful on the inside before our outward appearance can really shine (see Matthew 23:25-28).

No matter how we look on the outside, whether it be zit face, or bushy hair and eyebrows all in all, God knows and values us as worth more than anything that could ever compare. “You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you” (Song of Songs 4:7).  We are worth more than the purest gold, or richest chocolate diamond Kay Jewelers decides to sell this year.  More precious than the top ten Victoria’s Secret models that walk on the runway, or the movie stars that have had plastic surgery so many times, you no longer recognize their faces.

Our value is not found in the measure by which we weigh ourselves in comparison to the mirror appearing images.  For our life is like an image in a mirror, where we try to rush through life collecting all the praise, and comments and perfections from anyone who will care (see Psalms 39:6 ERV).  Yet in reality, the one who matters most, already accepts and loves you for who you are, not who you think you have to change and become.

Next time you take a look in the mirror and start criticizing yourself, remember this: The girl or guy reflecting back at you is only through the looking glass self.  Who we think we are.  Who we think we have to become.  Who we value and measure ourselves up to be. But no matter what we think, or how we feel, or what we look like, we are beautiful in God’s eyes and that evaluation is worth more than any earthly rating we could ever receive.

You are beautiful.  You are loved.  You are more precious than that airbrushed model or movie star in the magazine.  You are perfect through the looking glass of a perfect God, who created you to be you; from the inside looking out.